Moose Hunting for Grown Ups

Two moose hunters, Sean & Liam, got a pilot to fly them into the Canadian wilderness, where they managed to bag two big bull moose.

As they were loading the plane to return, the pilot said the plane could only take the hunters, their gear, but only one moose.

The two hunters objected strongly. "Last year we shot two, and the pilot let us take them both... and he had exactly the same airplane as yours."

Reluctantly, the pilot, not wanting to be outdone by another bush pilot, gave in and everything was loaded.

However, even under full power, the little plane couldn't handle the
heavy load and went down, crashing into the deep wooded wilderness.

Somehow, surrounded by the two moose, clothing and sleeping bags, Sean & Liam survived the crash.
After climbing out of the wreckage, Sean asked Liam, "'Any idea where we are?"

Liam replied, "I think we're pretty close to where we crashed last year!"

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  1. Paddy was at his local pub, slowly sipping a Guinness, not being the usual happy go lucky Irishman he usually is. The barkeep walks over to Paddy's table and says "G'day Paddy, you seem a wee bit down in the mouth today, what seems to be ailing ye?" Paddy looks around, points out the window and says "Do ye see that dock out there on the lake? I built that dock with me own hands, cut every log with me own axe, planed down every piece of lumber with me own wood planer, none of that fancy electric stuff for me. Drove all the nails myself with me 2lb riggin axe." The bartender looks at the dock and says "Aye Paddy, I do see that dock and it's a fine one for sure for sure." Paddy says "Aye but, do you ever see me walking down the street and hear someone say "Hey look, it's Paddy the Dock Builder?" The barkeep thinks a few seconds and says "No lad, I don't believe I ever have." Paddy looks out the other window and points at a rock wall and says "Do ye see that wall out there in that field? Built that wall with me own hands, dug up every rocks, split them with my own hammer and chisel, fit every stone in just the right place, no fancy mortar joints or anything like that." The barkeep says "Aye Paddy, and a fine wall it is, why just last week Bimm McCutcheon ran into that wall and totaled his car but nary a stone was out of place. Fine wall indeed." "Paddy sips his Guinness and says "Aye but, do you ever see me walking down the street and hear someone says "Look yonder, here comes Paddy the Stone Mason."? The barkeep ponders it for a few seconds and says "No Paddy, I cannot say I've ever heard anyone say such a thing." And Paddy says "Aye but, you fuck one sheep..."

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